


"You can't give more than yourself."

by demiclar



Series: Destcember 2020 [7]
Category: Destiny (Video Games)
Genre: Destcember Day 7, Edon x Torak things, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Stoneborn Order reimagined, but mostly just the comfort because the hurt happened a while ago, my soft gay bois
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-08
Updated: 2020-12-08
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:54:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 903
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27951113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/demiclar/pseuds/demiclar
Summary: [Spoilers for pt. 3 of Dare to Dream]Torak comfort's Edon after a military blunder.
Relationships: Male Guardian/Male Guardian (Destiny)
Series: Destcember 2020 [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2037118
Collections: Fireteam Aadya





	"You can't give more than yourself."

**Author's Note:**

> If you didn't see in the summary and you've read some of my other stuff, this has some spoilers for the third part of my Dare to Dream series, which includes Stitches, Scars and a third part that I have yet to post called Smoke.

Torak’s hands were gentle on Edon’s body. Edon’s battered, bruised, broken body. He handled him like glass, cleaning out his wounds and bandaging them with the care only a lover could show, as if every inch of his flesh was important to him. Edon wasn’t sure how that could be true. Torak…always seemed to see the good in him, but Edon was beginning to feel there was less and less good in him to see. Especially after what he’d done, how he’d failed.

His troops, his friends, his family even, they’d all been harmed because of him. He didn’t know if some of them were alive or dead, and it was all his fault. He was their commander, their leader. There was no one else calling the shots, no one up the chain to blame, and how heavy the blame was. It stung worse than his wounds, a guilt tearing him up from the inside out, and with every tender, gentle touch Torak set to his skin, he felt even more guilty. He’d gotten his troops into this mess, and yet somehow, he was able to return home to his lover’s care, to be treated gently, like glass, when he should’ve been beaten and battered and broken the way a murderer deserved. The Fallen didn’t matter anymore, they’d tricked him, but their attack hadn’t been personal. They were destined to battle forever, it wasn’t the Fallen to blame, even if they had launched the attack.

No, Edon had been the one to move his troops around, to abandon them when they needed him, to bring them back out on the front for a second rotation when he was the sole one who should have been punished. There was anger in him for Zavala, he’d been the one to order them back out, but it was a grain of sand amidst the anger he had for himself.

He tried to hide his flinch when Torak’s hands brushed over a particularly sensitive wound, his entire body stiffening in response. His lover noticed, his flinch poorly hidden, if at all.

“Sorry.” The other man murmured, dealing with the wound carefully as he laid gauze upon it and bandaged it carefully.

“It’s fine.” Edon breathed, his voice hardly even audible.

He deserved the pain, anyways. After his troops had been overwhelmed, he’d ordered them back to the wall while he’d held off the Fallen on his own, one man against a hoard, burning with solar light. Somehow, he’d been able to keep them back until reinforcements arrived, he could hardly remember now. All he could remember was living and dying in a terrible, endless cycle of pain and suffering and more pain. Still, it would never equal the pain his troops were facing now.

“Edon.” Torak’s voice drew him out of his own mind, at least for a moment. A warm hand held his chin gently. “I know you can’t stop thinking about it, but you’re only going to make it worse.”

“Good.” Edon whispered. He couldn’t meet Torak’s eyes.

“Edon,” Torak said again, a little firmer this time. “Please, you have to stop.” He told him. “You have nothing left to give, nothing left to help them with. You can’t give more than yourself, and you’ve already given everything you have.”

Edon dared a glance at him.

“It’s still my fault.” Edon reminded.

“Maybe.” Torak breathed, “But if it is, then you’ll be punished for it. I know you feel terrible and there’s a system in place for all of this to be addressed. You don’t have to keep dragging it out.”

Edon looked down at his feet. Even they were bruised and battered, bandages wrapped around his ankle and foot, he was pretty sure a few of his toes might even be broken, too.

It was true he had a tendency to drag out punishments. To be overly critical of himself, to expect inhuman perfection. He wasn’t sure where he got it from. He believed everything on the front and the Wall was his responsibility when he was posted there, and even when he as on vacation or away for other work, it was his fault for leaving. Torak and Amaya were always the ones to tell him not everything was his fault, but every time he listened, he was overwhelmed with this same guilt, even if he knew there was no way he could’ve prevented what had happened.

It wasn’t the same now, he could have prevented what had happened, if he’d been smarter or more thoughtful, less preoccupied with his own problems. But Torak was still right. He couldn’t change anything, not now. There was nothing left for him to do.

He looked to Torak with tear-filled eyes, reaching out for the other man’s hand. Torak only offered his arms, and Edon crossed the space between them, falling against Torak’s chest as he finally let the tension bleed from his body.

Torak held him for a long while, eventually picking him up in his arms and carrying him to their bed. He set him down softly, finishing all the bandages Edon still needed before he tucked him into the bed, joining him and pulling him straight back into his arms. Edon fell asleep allowing himself to be comforted, to be held in his lover’s arms and wrapped in his warmth. He prayed his troops would live on to feel the same comforts.

**Author's Note:**

> I've been doing this for a whole week? On time?? I'm?? soo proud of myself omg??


End file.
